Breast Cancer

It seems I have made a practice of being inconsistent. I dislike this. Waiting is getting old, real fast. Maybe this sentence will give my inability to move a heart attack. I feel whole again. And this is a direct result of me letting the people I trust, see me enough to let trust be an action, instead of a theory.

Hate is such a mixed shower of acid rain and bath salts. Shuffling thoughts felt good, but the real aces were eventually lost.
Enter: The Joker
Enter: The Fool

Music has given me life again. Music and soul searching over a Black and Mild. I have had two shows that happened, and went alright in the past two weeks. But I chalk them up as yet more marks in the "L" column, because they could have been better, but were not due to my inaction. I am not keeping up with the standard. Not "The Standard", "My Standard". This pattern of lowering my game and playing "down" to the minor ripples I am facing needs to stop. Its funny how communing with memories pushes me to make now better. Or maybe it is just funny that I havent been doing this ceremony of self check in on a regular basis.

The combination of sheer artistry that was Wicked, and this past sunday in Spring Awakening has shaken the ashes from these pheonix feathers. The critical discussion of technique and accomplishment has sparked a new fire.

Early October helped me realize the importance of temperance. Deprivation isn't strength, actions with reason behind them are. On a related note, I am done partying. Celebrating mediocracy will no longer be tolerated.

The hibernating animal is no longer dormant.
Enter The sound and the Fury: Stage Right

It is time.




Heartwill

"You cant change the game if you dont know the score"